the ladies love it!

when guys don't wash their hands, they always talk about it.

the most common explanations are:

my dick['s] clean

my mom taught me not to piss on my hands

i have no money

whateverrr i'm drrrruuunk

but i got me's a special one last night.

"nah, dude i'm good. i got piss all over my hands though!"

"and you don't wanna wash?

"naaaaah, the ladies love my piss fingers, baby. i can get like three of em suckin my hands off. they can't get enough of piss fingers ;)"

these two other guys were pissing next to each other, one putting his hand on the partition so he can stay standing up.

the one who needs no assistance begins conversation:

"yo, you alright? look like you about to fall over."

"what? i'm good, i'm chillin."

"well then why are you holding yourself up on the wall? you sure you're alright?"

he then proceeds to put his hands being his head as if he's about to receive oral, dawg "oh yeah, i'm chillin"

"what is that?" the other guy responds, "you don't need your hands?"

"nah, dude, i just let it hang."

"shit, i gotta hold it, i'll probably piss on myself otherwise. how big is yours anyway?"

he laughs, shakes his head, and doesn't answer.

dick asking guy (DAG), then comes up to the counter. i offer him soap and a towel.

"man, some people," he laments with a dissapointed tone, "sometimes i just like to come in here and talk. some people could talk enough to write a book, some don't say enough."

i guess not getting a dick size is really getting to him. he continues...

"you know there was a fight earlier?"

"no shit," i say.

"yeah man, you gotta have a good time, cause if you ain't, then you're having a bad time."

as he says this he turns and looks at the guy who didn't answer. apparently his silence is really making DAG have a bad time.

he finally responds: "haha, man, you're a short story at best. i'm an epic novel."

i never thought that would be a metaphor for dick size.

the more you know ~~~~^***